The Hatch Files

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MadDog "Christopher Reeve broke his leg on August 17th during physical therapy. The exact cause of the injury is unknown, but sources close to Reeve suggest it may have something to do with trying to get a crippled guy to walk."
Braden M hahaha.. good point

MadDog The Ants Are My Friends... theyre blowing in the wind...
MadDog pretty little thing, lemon-lime chicana 'cause mama I'm sure hard to henna now, yes I am
MadDog a wombat man a wombat man
MadDog Come-a come-a come-a come-a come-a to me, Leon! Become-a come-a come-a come-a come-a comedian!
MadDog I really don't like him... Doctor Cashpot, Doctor Cashpot
MadDog They shook head lice all over the church floor
MadDog I've got the best Glade Plug-Ins south of America!
MadDog Slow-motion Walter, dat fire-engine guy
Braden M hehe.. misheard lyrics..
MadDog heheh .. yep

Braden M is this maddog??
MadDog no, its freakin goldilocks... *flicks your forehead*
Braden M arrghh.. Mikey has been taken over by Goldilocks and is flicking foreheads left and right all round.. NOoooooooooooo

Braden M what?? where?
MadDog neighbours last night... with michael from human nature!!!!
Braden M oh.. I missed it.. but yeah.. I saw him on the adds? who is he buttfucking?
MadDog doc kennedy
Braden M ahh.. Susan won't be happy bout that.. although her being a lesbian in real life.. well.. maybe she wouldn't mind..
MadDog yeah... buttfucking...
Braden M yup.. on camera.. and human nature can write a song about it.. called.. I buttfucked Karl Kennedy
MadDog :)
Braden M and then john farnham and jimmy barnes can get on the act and all record a song called... lets all buttfuck together...
MadDog a yippie-yie-oh!

MadDog oh.. and have you seen my eggwhisk?
Braden M i wish.. so I could smack this bitch down who I'm talking to.
MadDog yup... nothing's quite as effective in delivering a holy hell of an ass-whupping as an egg whisk...
Braden M freakin oath..

MadDog Guess who I am... "oh OH oh OH oh OH oh OH oOoOoh oOoOoh OOOOooooaaaahhhh...."
Braden M umm.. no idea?
MadDog Pink!
Braden M hahahaha.. is that one of her songs?
MadDog you know.. that one withthe opera singer...
Braden M oh yeah.. yup
MadDog yep.. well thats me... :)

MadDog I think Mark Philippoussis and Rove McManus should get married... cause Mark's got the word Poo in is surname and Rove's got the word Anus in his... Good theory or what?

MadDog did you see hollow man?
Braden M braden went to the news, this is joshua poort the work experience boy
MadDog hello josh... ... well did YOU see hollow man?
Braden M nah, i didnt get the chance to, but i saw the making of it looked very very cool
MadDog yes... t'was...
Braden M yup.

MadDog ive been staring at this sp1 instalation for 5 minutes now, and I've come to the conlusion that each little piece of paper that flies from one folder to the other gets rotated -90 degrees when it moves across... what sort of filing system is that? I thing Bill Gates has a lot to answer for...
Braden M hehe.. fun stuff indeed... I bet they imploy someone who does that job exactly in microsoft.
MadDog yup.. he has a little name badge: Jake Mortenson Senior flying piece of paper animator Windows 2000 SP1 Installer division
Braden M he probably get 50 grand a year for that too.. and he learnt it at filing paper at -90 degrees university.
MadDog yeah... he hated that place so that he made the pieces of paper file at negative 90 degrees just get his own twisted revenge...
Braden M hehe.. yup..

MadDog *old brittish person voice* You are so terribly old

MadDog BOKU WA JOHNNY DESU! I found someone who could translate that for me.... it means "My name is johnny!" or literally "I am Johnny-like"

MadDog hello best man.... you realise that makes you better than everyone else dont you.... except me.. that's the loop hole.... :)
Braden M haha.. yeah.. every dam night i've been trying to write some sort of speech in my head.. its hard..
MadDog Heheheh
Braden M but don't worry.. it'll be cool.. it'll be perfect
MadDog hehehe.... mention the word 'schlong' and I'll kill you...
Braden M oh bugger.. i'm going to have to start all over again..

MadDog have you ever designed your own package?
Braden M package of what?
MadDog you know.. your package, man... your... *wink wink* package....
Braden M don't ever wink at my package...
MadDog shit.. sorry.... yeah.... err... ahem... *looks around cautiously*
Braden M yeah.. fucken cautiously i hope..

Braden M the church guy didn't mention anything about wanting to have sex with 12 year old boys who look like a young Brad Pitt did he??
MadDog no.... of course not.... it was a young freddie prinze jnr...
Braden M really.. shit.. Sarah Michelle Gellar isn't going to be looking forward to a long term relationship with him then.. cause a couple years down the track, if he goes mental about genital fondling for no reason.. i wouldn't like to be around him...

MadDog dude...
MadDog err.. dude? *pokes fore head*
Braden M yeah.. dude..
MadDog ahh.. there you are...
Braden M yes.. here.. i am.. in a way, that has never been done before..

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